Stanford can't recruit

Gabi Ailes will be a frosh for the Stanford Cardinal this fall, where she looks to become the first-ever actual libero on The Farm (Yeah, I know, Fishburn, etc. They don't count.). And she's having quite the senior year.

Not only did Ailes help her high school win volleyball and basketball state championships, but this spring she decided to really apply herself as No. 2 singles player for the tennis team. The result? Oh, no big deal, she just won the Nebraska state championship for No. 2 singles, that's all.

Last year the future Cardinal only finished third in state, but that was while playing with the tennis coach's wife's racket. So this year, with a few private lessons under her belt and her own racket, she won the title.

How annoyed must all of Ailes's opponents be, knowing they lost to someone who's only playing the sport as a hobby? That'll stick in your craw.

Well at least they're not desperate or anything

Stanford's mens volleyball team is 1-17 and now they're hoping fan support will help them get a win?

Please, don't drag more innocent lives into this. Haven't you done enough already?

Well, duh.

Mira Costa and Mizuno Long Beach's Alix Klineman was named Gatorade National Volleyball Player of the Year.

Gee, didn't see that one coming or anything.

This follows the "Oh, really?" uttered by nearly everyone except Jerritt Elliott when Klineman decided to attend Stanford, home of The Kehoe, The Barboza, The Akinradewo, and so on.

With the award Klineman joins past winners including Megan Hodge, Barboza, and Kristin Richards. In all, seven future Stanford Cardinals have won the award eight times (Barboza won it twice, natch).