Wednesday, September 30, 2009

I've seen this movie before...

So, remember when that groups of clubs got together and wanted to talk to USA Volleyball about some concerns they had? And USA Volleyball said "Thanks but no thanks?" And then JVA was created and every college coach's life went down the toilet? Remember that?

It might happen again, but this time in beach volleyball.

According to an AP story, some of the beach big-wigs sent a proposal to USAV to ask for the implementation of a Beach Oversight Committee, and Doug Beal, not having read the proposal yet, said, "From my perspective, beach is significantly represented on our board."

So, that happened. But, I wouldn't worry about it. I mean, USAV has never taken a wrong turn before, so...

The article then continued:

"Indoor volleyball was invented in 1895..."

Oh, cripes, really? This is the way we're going?

"... by a western Massachusetts YMCA instructor..."

Does anyone care? What happened to talking about beach volleyball v. USAV?

"The beach game developed as a diversion for beachgoing families in California in the 1920s..."

UGH. Maybe I should see what's on TV.

"...before its popularity spiked when a nudist camp outside Paris adopted the game."

Wait...what? What was that about a nudist camp outside Paris?

"Ever since, the two disciplines have been on separate trajectories."

No, no no no. You can't just drop "nudist camp outside Paris" on us and then just leave it at that. What was this camp called? What French "philosopher" camp up with this idea? Did they smoke clove cigarettes while playing? Were they allowed to wear berets!? I NEED ANSWERS.

Annie Nelson is not easily impressed

"They weren't anything special." - Rhode Island's freshman setter, Annie Nelson, after losing to Saint Louis, 25-8, 25-17, 25-19.

Monday, September 28, 2009

From the Monday Papers...

“We are going to be setting drills up that are very defensive minded this week, especially to go against a right side attack." - Maryland associate head coach Tami Ores. (Psst...anyone playing Maryland this weekend...set, the left, side. They'll never see it coming.)

"I didn’t want to go but my mom said, ‘I’ll give you $75 and you can get your hair done if you’ll just go to the tryout.'” - BYU's Kayla Walker, demonstrating the power, the lure the promise of a new hairdo has over America's teenagers, especially 6'5" teens from Utah.

"Vulcan women break into top 20 volleyball poll." - Headline from that caused Star Trek nerds everywhere to Twitter "The prophecies are true!" over and over again, and plan trips to their nearest volleyball poll.

"How tough is Oregon senior Sonja Newcombe?" - Oh I love these! HOW TOUGH IS SHE? "The all-American outside hitter wasn’t expected to play ... Sunday after suffering a subluxed patella (partially dislocated kneecap) in her right knee on Friday night. But Newcombe wasn’t about to miss a conference match." Hm...not as funny as I thought it was going to be. But I've heard Oregon humor is a lot different from humor here in the United States.

"We try to get the ball back and slam it down their throats. And that happened." - Plain speakin' Tom Hilbert on the Rams' 3-0 win over Texas Christian University. Poor Christians.

"According to Shipman, the three 'grabbed and detached leaves from the tree, which constitutes battery.'" - From the Daily Californian, in an article describing the arrest of three Cal fans after the Stanford match. "Constitutes battery"? Isn't this just pruning? Weren't they just engaged in forestry?

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Oh quotes. How I've missed you.

"I couldn’t be prouder of our intensity...” UCSB's Kathy Gregory, just getting warmed up after the Gauchos beat UC Irvine in an epic 5-game match.

“I told them that (winning) is a muscle that they have to develop." - Nebraska's top banana John Cook, who wouldn't mind if his Huskers strained one of those winning muscles aaannnytime now.

"Refuse to lose is what it’s all about..." More Kathy-isms. It was a 5-game match, after all.

"This season is going to put a lot of grey hairs on my head." Samford head coach Derek Schroeder. He's not kidding. Here's what Schroeder looked like in August:

And here's what he looks like today:

"As we got better they got a little tighter..." Thanks, Coach Kathy Gregory, we'll get back to you in a sec-- "We hung in there, It’s all about never give up and never say die." Yes, but -- "You just got to leave it out on the court. Where is our heart, where is our heart?"


"One thing I really like about our team is that you can't tell what the score is by looking at their faces." Vol's Rob Patrick. Is the same true about Patrick? Let's see:

Not sure if you can tell by Patrick's face who's winning the battle, but I think it's obvious that the clipboard is losing the war.

“The funny thing is..." (Oh boy) "once we found our heart we ripped their heart out." That's...vivid, Kathy. Things are much more fun with UCSB winning!

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Welcome to the Thunderdome

UCLA loses to Arizona State, which loses to USC, which loses to Arizona, which loses to UCLA.

Albany beats Santa Clara.

Long Beach beats Fullerton after Fullerton beat UCLA, who also lost to Long Beach.

Texas A&M beats Nebraska, then loses to Missouri.

Wichita State loses to Missouri State

UCSB is 10-2.


Is there nothing concrete that a volleyball fan can rely upon?! Where is the frame of reference!? Is nothing sacred???

Aahhh...that's better.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Taylor Williams breaks the chain

From the recap of Thursday night's Boston College / Wake Forest match:
Senior Taylor Williams then decided to stop play for a few minutes when one of her powerful attacks went flying into the net, causing the support chains to break and the entire net to topple over.


Well, if she don't love the net now, she will never love the net again. And I can still hear what you're saying: Taylor Williams would never break the chain.

Fun with Contradictions

Cal State Fullerton is for real! They're blowin' up! They're gonna make the tourn--

Oh. Um...

San Diego State is for real! They're off the hook! The Aztecs are back!

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Totally Unfair Picture Captions Return!

In another example of the country's economic woes, UCLA has been forced to sell off nearly all of their chairs.


"What's the Chinese word for 'left arm'?"

Post-match kiss is out, too

Last week, the NCAA, showing all the wisdom of a 4th grade Cootie Patrol, recommended volleyball not partake in the usual pregame handshake in a HiLARious effort to try and stem the spread of swine flu.

Yeah, it's probably OK for 16 sweaty athletes to roll around on the same floor that probably hasn't been cleaned since the Clinton administration, and to use the same towels to wipe sweat off that floor that they use to wipe off their hands and arms, just as long as NOBODY SHAKES HANDS!!!

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Once more unto the breach...

"I told them that in the book ‘Outliers’ the author says that most plane crashes happen because the co-pilot doesn’t do their job."
- Oregon head coach Jim Moore
So, hey all you co-pilots...NO PRESSURE OR ANYTHING, but it's all your fault if your volleyball team totally eats it. Or, wait...what?

"“I was reading on the Internet that’s how it spreads the most — through a cough.”
- Rice head coach Genny Volpe-- after having to bail on UTSA's tourney because of swine flu -- sharing what she learned about H1N1 from the Internet, which seems like one of the more rational things one could learn from the Internet about...anything. No conspiracy involving the mallard ducks and the Pentavirate? I'm disappointed.

"Sam Dabbs is this team’s security blanket."
- LSU's Fran Flory, explaining why Dabbs' nickname is "Wooby."