Joel McCartney's svenjolly-like influence must be stopped

That Joel McCartney, he's got more surprises up his sleeves than an episode of LOST crossed with X-Files meets Twin Peaks...on acid.

First, he lures Deitre Collins from her cushy Ivy League head coaching job where she only won three conference titles in a row. Now he abducts Kevin Campbell from eventual national champion Penn State (surely, right?) to be an assistant at Georgia. The focused coaching power now assembled in Athens could jumpstart the Hubble telescope.

Campbell--very nice person--is one of the more vexing personalities in volleyball because you always have to qualify her name:

"Who's the other assistant at Penn State?"

"Kevin?"

"No, the woman."

"What?"

"What is on second base."

"I don't know."

"He's playing third."

(golf clap, polite laughter)

McCartney also hired former Winthrop player Mary Hock to be Georgia's Program Specialist.

Wait, what? What in the world is a "program specialist"? Is she in charge of the media guide? Some kind of graphic design / layout ninja? Or is this a computer-based specialty? Is the entire Bulldog program moving to Linux Red Hat or something? I'm so confused...