Quotes! Wonderful quotes!

"In this conference if you play uninspired they'll smack you upside the head." - Russ Rose, after Penn State dropped their first regular season game since [EDIT: 2007, not 1997. Whoops].

"This was more of a mental victory for us since we haven’t been successful against American in quite some time." - Colgate head honcho Ryan Baker on his team's win over American. "Quite some time" = "since 1996," the first time the two teams played each other.

“We realized that beating ourselves was not an option." - Florida's Cassandra Anderson, breaking the most important rule of Fight Club.

""She's quiet-spectacular, and sometimes those are the most dangerous ones." - UW's Jimmy McLaughlin on Airial Salvo. This is where I make a lame comparison between "quiet-spectacular" and "jumbo shrimp," and then ask why we park on the driveway, drive on the parkway, and so on and so forth. Sometimes you gotta do these things just on principle.

"Michigan volleyball libero Sloane Donhoff took a line-drive kill off her left cheek that reverberated all the way to the Cliff Keen Arena press box." - From the Michigan Daily's article on the Wolverine's loss to Illinois. Reverberated? So it echoed all the way up to the press box? Did her face explode? What kind of acoustics do they have there in Keen Arena? Is this an amphitheater?

"UCLA found itself at a loss of energy on Saturday night during its victory against California. Literally." - The UCLA Daily Bruin re: the brief power outage during the match. Everyone's a comedian.

"If people didn't know the score, they would think we won." Seminole top banana Chris Poole. Yes, if it weren't for those stupid scoreboards, Florida State would win lots of matches! They'd--wait, what's that? There's more to the quote? " — just by looking at the statistics." Ooohhh. Heh. Gotcha.

"“All we had to do was handle a free ball, and we don’t handle a free ball. At 14-13, we handle a free ball and it’s 15-13, we win. But we don’t handle a free ball.” - Oregon's Jim Moore. So, what you're saying, if I'm reading between the lines here correctly -- and I think I am -- I'm sensing that you're saying you didn't handle a free ball. Is that the gist of it? Cracked the code.

"I'm going home with film, and I'm going to stay up as late as I have to in order to make sure we know everything that they do." - Georgia's Joel McCartney after losing to Arkansas 3-0. And this ashtray! And this paddle game, the ashtray and the paddle game and that's all I need. And this remote control...